They Came for the Crabs, but Stayed for the Kids

They came for the crabs, but stayed for the kids.

More than 50 parents, grandparents, and caregivers gathered last Wednesday at the Mace’s Lane Middle School in Cambridge for an introduction to the Parent Encouragement Program (PEP).  

Above a steady whap-whap-whap of mallets on shells, participants were soon considering a more profound lesson in making connections with their children that last a lifetime.  

Remarks by PEP Executive Director Kathy Hedge, City Commissioner Shay Lewis-Sisco, Dorchester Engagement Coordinator Tenishia Tillery, and longtime participant La’Dajia White were both personal and practical. Through them all, one message recurred: parenting is hard, but help is available, and it works.

‘Break the Curse’

La’Dajia White, known as an “OG” – a participant from the first session in Dorchester back in 2023 – set the tone with a message that drew applause.

“We need to break the curse,” she said. “Let’s not just think about breaking the curse and talking about it. Let’s come together so we can change things.”

That curse, White told The Spy afterward, is the cycle that continues when people who were not well-parented struggle to raise their own children. She said PEP is helping families break that pattern by providing guidance and community.

“It wasn’t just parents in the room tonight,” White said. “It was grandmothers, uncles, anyone who has responsibility for raising a kid. Whoever is responsible, parenthood should be a positive experience.”

From Crabs to Conversation

What began as a tasty meal quickly pivoted to meaningful conversations. After dinner, participants watched a short video delineating various styles of parenting.  Later, participants broke into small groups to discuss which of the techniques were familiar to them, and whether they worked in keeping the peace at home. 

City Commissioner Shay Lewis-Sisco, a Dorchester schools career coach representing Cambridge’s Second Ward and who helped introduce PEP to local families, said programs like this make a difference.

“As you heard tonight, parenting does not come with a manual,” Lewis-Sisco said. “The program offers the tools parents need to engage their children better, helping them succeed not just in school, but also in their community and in life.”

She said the lessons parents learn extend beyond the home. “As parents, when we invest in ourselves, we invest in our children,” she said. “They are the future. The better we show up for them, the better our children are going to be.”

Building PEP in Dorchester 

PEP has been around since 1982, mainly serving areas near its Montgomery County base.  It arrived on the Shore in late 2022, thanks to Dorchester County native and philanthropist Kevin Beverly, who encouraged the group to expand eastward. 

Through the nonprofit Moving Dorchester Forward, the program soon took root, and within months, the first eight-week course was underway in the evenings at local schools.

“Parenting is the toughest job on the planet,” Hedge told attendees. “You train for almost every other job, and yet we don’t train for parenting. Every parent faces frustrations and challenges because every child is different. That means you have to keep adapting.”

She added that PEP’s message is simple. “There’s a stigma around parenting classes that makes people think it means you’re a bad parent. What we want parents to know is that everyone needs support.”

A Parent’s Journey

No one embodies that message better than Tillery, who began as a participant in January 2023 and now serves as the Dorchester Engagement Coordinator.

“I wish I had received this information years ago,” she said. “I understood the value it brought to parents, and I just wanted to help get it to everybody I could. I believed in the program, the tools, and the resources it provides.”

Tillery said she was struck by how involved parents were during the session. “I was pleasantly surprised by the engagement,” she said. “They seemed to genuinely like the conversations. Parenting can be difficult, but here people realize they aren’t alone.”

After attending as a parent, she became a facilitator while continuing to take classes. “I saw the value it brought to parents and wanted to share it with as many people as I could.”

First Impressions

Among the new faces at the session was Lameisha Bradley, a mother of three. She admitted she came for the dinner but stayed for the message.

“Tonight’s session really gives me a different perspective,” Bradley said. “There’s no question that raising children isn’t easy. And I want my kids to grow up to be the best adults they can be. I think I’ll sign up for the full course.”

That kind of reaction is what PEP hopes for, according to Hedge. The introductory sessions are designed to let parents sample the program in a welcoming environment that includes free meals, childcare, and open discussion. “One presentation isn’t enough to change longstanding patterns of behavior,” she said. “But it can start a conversation that leads to lasting change.”

Blueprint for the Future

In March 2024, PEP received a grant from the Maryland Community Health Resources Commission through the Consortium for Coordinated Community Supports. The funding is part of the state’s Blueprint for the Future education legislation, which invests in programs that strengthen student mental health.

Hedge said that makes sense, because helping parents ultimately helps students. “If parents lack support and tools, they can’t help their kids,” she said. “We share strategies so parents can better support their children’s emotional health. We want to help raise kids who are confident and capable.”

PEP now works closely with Dorchester County Public Schools, offering multiple sessions each year in both English and Spanish. The organization trains local parents as facilitators and promoters, ensuring that families hear about the program from trusted voices in the community.

Results That Matter

PEP has partnered with the University of Chicago’s NORC Research Center to measure the program’s impact. Over three years of evaluation, participants have reported significant improvements in parent-child communication, reduced home stress, and increased confidence.

Attendance in Dorchester has been strong, Tillery said. “People showed real engagement. The discussions were lively and meaningful, and I think everyone felt that it was helpful and even enjoyable,” she said.

Hedge, who joined PEP 12 years ago as a struggling parent herself, said she has seen those results firsthand. “I came to PEP as a desperate parent,” she said. “I don’t think my now 25-year-old would be where he is today if it weren’t for this program. It really works.”